Day 60

Another round number. I figured I'd go for one on the treadmill too. 10 miles. OK so I hurt, but it was worth it, if only to say that I did it; which is obviously not worth much to anyone but myself. It's not as though anyone other than me is reading this.

No round numbers on the scale, but the readout was quite pleasing anyway. I'm about to weigh less than I have in 8 years.

I'm still the same person on the inside. I still see the fat guy in the mirror in my mind's eye. I always did. That's why even when I got so small before I enlisted I never really felt good about myself.

Sure my confidence level was through the roof, but it didn't change the way I perceived myself. I guess I just learned act on the way others perceived me.

No one knew that ever since I was 12 years old I've seen myself as this overweight slob.

I've always hid my weight relatively well, at least until I became too huge to hide anything anymore. Even then no one would guess that I weighed 270.

Now, at 226.5, yes, I'm counting the half pounds, people still think I weigh less than I do. I don't know how though, because I still see that fat face in the mirror and wonder if I'm ever going to lose enough to be able to stand seeing my reflection.

How my wife has put up with this thing that I am, I will never know.

Day 60: 10 miles in 3 hours.

I'm tired, aching, and a bit cranky. Maybe a really violent vampire movie like Let Me In will make me feel better. Bring on the pop corn and Coke Zero!